Episode 62: Sissy Goff

Sissy Goff joins me for Episode 62. She is the Director of Child & Adolescent Counseling at Daystar outside of Nashville. She’s been a counselor for 24 years and is also an author of the books Raising Girls, Intentional Parenting, Raising Boys & Girls and the latest Are My Kids On Track. I truly enjoyed chatting with her. I wish we lived near her so that my girls and myself could benefit from who she is. She may have thought I was kidding, but I literally had at least 30 questions I wanted to ask her. We didn’t cover everything on my list so the good news is that she will be coming back on the show in the future! 

But in today’s episode, we chat about anxiety in our kids, parenting personalities, how to assume the best in your kids and how to develop our girls self-worth. This is an episode full of goodness. I’m praying for you all as you raise girls, love girls in ministry, love nieces and grand girls. So pull up a chair to my kitchen table and join the conversation.

I hope you enjoyed my conversation with Sissy. I think one of the biggest takeaways for me was the idea that maybe parenting has more to do with my own sanctification than the result of who I’m raising. That was one of the most freeing moments of realization. I know that God is working on me, but seeing it through the eyes of the Refiner changes it for me. It's not about punishing me. It's not about me doing all the right things in order to raise the “right” kids. @@Parenting is about letting God do His sanctifying work in me so that I reflect His image more@@.

Links:

Survival Kit:

Connect with Sissy:  Instagram // Website // Twitter // Facebook

Connect with Daystar Counseling:  Instagram // Website // Twitter // Facebook

Takeaways From Our Conversation:

  • Sometimes one of the biggest anxiety triggers in our kids is our own anxiety. If we hover over them then they think that they can't do. We need to teach them to be brave--being brave doesn't mean you aren't afraid. We need to let them be brave in the midst of being afraid. "To work through the anxiety, you just have to do the scary thing." We have to teach them the tools to work through it. 
  • Pull out the good in something that is potentially harmful. For instance, when my child is having a strong reaction to me about something. I need to notice to her that strong emotions aren't bad, and one day you will do something great with that, but today directed at me isn't the best option.
  • Kids (and adults) have to retrain their brains and that takes time. 
  • @@Your child will never validate who you are@@.
  • Girls reserve their most negative emotions for home. So how can we notice the good? Pray like crazy that God would give you the eyes to see the good that they are doing. Teach yourself to think that way--write down three things that you saw her do the day before that were life giving or thoughtful. Really think about her strengths.
  • Every girl in early adolescence will struggle with self-esteem. We need to make sure to talk about how that is normal to feel that way. When something goes wrong in a girl's world, a girl will blame herself.
  • How can we build their self-esteem? Girls who are delighted more feel more delightful. We need to find ways to enjoy our girls for who they are. Helping kids to give somewhere builds self-esteem. I heard my boss Reggie Joiner say, "@@If you want them to feel significant, then give them something significant to do@@."

What did you enjoy about this episode? What was your takeaway. Let's continue the conversation  on Instagram or Twitter or you can send me an email here

Thank you for following along life with me. I love being apart of your day. And as always, I hope this show helps you survive a little easier.

A new episode every Tuesday... just subscribe.

Subscribe for free on iTunes or Stitcher or your favorite podcast app so that you don't miss out on great conversations with women just like you. Women who are surviving and thriving. You don't have to do life alone. Be inspired, encouraged and entertained by women like Sandra Stanley, Shannan Martin, Jamie B. Golden, Mo Isom, Annie F. Downs, Joni Lay from Lay Baby Lay, Christy Nockels and many more.

Did you enjoy today's conversation? Rate the podcast.

My goal each week is to encourage you to survive in this very thing called life. If you were encouraged or inspired or entertained, head over to iTunes and leave a brief review with a 5 star rating.

Here is a recent one from osborne.shay:  "I have been really thankful for your podcast in 2016. You are one of the most relatable casters and I'm thankful for your realness. Thank you for sharing yourself with the world. I have added many podcasts to my listening last year, but yours remains one of my must listen-to's and I'm grateful. Keep it up, Sarah!" 

Your review will help get the podcast in front of new listeners who are just like you looking to know that they aren't alone in life. Thank you for being awesome!

 

Episode 61: Erin Loechner

Erin Loechner joins me for Episode 61. She is a writer, stylist and mom, living in the mid-west. She blogs at design for mankind and the heart of her is encouraging women to stop trying to define and label everything and just enjoy the life that we are actually given.

And with that, we talk about failure, parenting and the art of letting go. We weave the conversation around her new book Chasing Slow with a common thread of finding freedom, beauty and yourself in the middle of the chase. So pull up a chair to my kitchen table and join the conversation.

I hope you enjoyed my conversation with Erin. Chatting with her truly felt like sitting with a girlfriend that you've known for a long time. Her kindness and authenticity makes her so relatable. I really liked the bottom-line message about learning to @@embrace who you are--all of you@@. The parts that are smooth and the parts that are rough around the edges. That is a step in learning to love you and finding contentment where you are. We need to learn to embrace our own hypocrisies and stop trying to soften our edges. Small admissions, no excuses, can bring freedom. Its just about being you--not your better self, but just you.

Links:

 

Survival Kit:

  • Easy Meals. Erin's go to is frying chopped up cauliflower in buffalo sauce. Sarah's go to meal is burrito bowls (ground meat seasoned with taco seasonings, black beans, onions, peppers, rice, salsa, guac)

(Amazon affiliate links used when possible. Don't forget to use SurvivingSarah.com/amazon when shopping for any of your amazon needs.)

Connect with Erin:  Instagram // Website // Twitter // Facebook // Pinterest

Takeaways From Our Conversation:

  • "Sometimes we try so hard to change our life that we don't let life change us." There are lessons to be found in the discomfort. There is so much growth opportunity that happens after failing. We get to grow from our learning experiments.
  • @@Often the cracks in our lives & the discomfort are part of who we are & are not a bad thing about us@@. Stop fearing the failure and understand that it is a daily practice of learning. "The first step of learning anything is failing at it."

  • @@Practice letting go of the small things so that you can let go in the big things@@.

  • We get to parent today and we aren't promised tomorrow. It is freeing to focus on parenting today. Take the noose of the future and free yourself to parent today. If you made a passive aggressive comment then it doesn't make you a passive aggressive person. Don't let an action label you or label your kids. We can have patterns of behavior, but resist the temptation to say, "how many times do i have to tell you?" 

  • Grace is releasing that metric and definition of what things are supposed to look like. Put the relationship first and not focus on the outcome. We keep score all the time of ourselves or our spouse or our children. Rebekah Lyons said, "Those who keep score do because they don't know their own value." Take the metric off.

  • Rules about social media: Go offline more than online. Stop working from a place of fear and be passionate about who you are. Live offline enough so that you have something to say. Release the expectations of what you are supposed to say. Don't take yourself too seriously and it will be fun. Think about what your brain is doing when you are online. Figure out why that message is offending you. Restrictions won't always solve the problem.

  • The opposite of control is surrender.

What did you enjoy about this episode? What was your takeaway. Let's continue the conversation  on Instagram or Twitter or you can send me an email here

Thank you for following along life with me. I love being apart of your day. And as always, I hope this show helps you survive a little easier.

A new episode every Tuesday... just subscribe.

Subscribe for free on iTunes or Stitcher or your favorite podcast app so that you don't miss out on great conversations with women just like you. Women who are surviving and thriving. You don't have to do life alone. Be inspired, encouraged and entertained by women like Sandra Stanley, Shannan Martin, Jamie B. Golden, Mo Isom, Annie F. Downs, Joni Lay from Lay Baby Lay, Christy Nockels and many more.

Did you enjoy today's conversation? Rate the podcast.

My goal each week is to encourage you to survive in this very thing called life. If you were encouraged or inspired or entertained, head over to iTunes and leave a brief review with a 5 star rating.

Here is a recent one from osborne.shay:  "I have been really thankful for your podcast in 2016. You are one of the most relatable casters and I'm thankful for your realness. Thank you for sharing yourself with the world. I have added many podcasts to my listening last year, but yours remains one of my must listen-to's and I'm grateful. Keep it up, Sarah!" 

Your review will help get the podcast in front of new listeners who are just like you looking to know that they aren't alone in life. Thank you for being awesome!

Episode 60: Jami Amerine

Jami Amerine joins me for Episode 60. She lives on a ranch in West Texas with her husband and children. Jami really is a mom for all women because she has 7 kids ranging from a 17 month old to one getting married. She is a blogger at SacredGroundStickyFloors.com and a soon to be published author.

We have a candid conversation about why they chose foster care and adoption, her journey to truly believing Jesus, and how we can learn to do brave things. So pull up a chair to my kitchen table and join the conversation.

I hope you enjoyed my conversation with Jami. When we were chatting, it was like I bolded the following phrase in my head that Jami said: @@Believing God is the catalyst for doing brave things@@. @@When you believe that God is for you, that He loves you and that He makes you capable, then you can do brave things@@. Not only do I want to be a brave person, but I want our kids to do brave things. Brave doesn't mean that you aren't afraid. It means that you do something even though you are afraid. What are you currently afraid of? What do you feel like God is asking you to step into or out of? The catalyst for doing that brave thing is to start believing God.

Links:

Survival Kit:

  • Truth - believing God
  • Coffee

(Amazon affiliate links used when possible. Don't forget to use SurvivingSarah.com/amazon when shopping for any of your amazon needs.)

Connect with Jami:  Instagram // Website // Twitter // Facebook

Takeaways From Our Conversation:

  • Stepping into foster care and adoption was something they did because they wanted to rewrite their story. They wanted their kids to see who they said they would be. I love the idea of this. If you could rewrite your story, who would you be and what would you do?
  • She had and IF/THEN Jesus theology. If she did all the right things, then Jesus would do all the right things. She wouldn't face harm. Yet, that was the opposite of what happened. She was afraid of God after walking through so many tough circumstances. God is not mean. He is all good. While we were helpless, Christ died for us (Romans 5 ). All of us have sin--our sin looks different--yet we were all helpless, Christ died for us. Where sin increased, grace increased all the more.
  • We should be people of restoration. She talked about how maybe her view of foster care should focus on the families. Maybe her mantra should be that we are for the families.
  • @@We don't need our kids to be self-sufficient for their righteousness@@. If there's never a moment of brokenness, then why would they ever call out to God. We try to protect our kids and control everything so that they don't have to suffer through like we did, but this stuff is just part of their walk to make them His own. @@God is writing a story on our kids lives@@.

What did you enjoy about this episode? What was your takeaway. Let's continue the conversation  on Instagram or Twitter or you can send me an email here

A big thank you to Surviving Sarah sponsor, Flourish + Co. Are you a mom who thought she'd find her purpose in motherhood and didn't? Are you a woman who at the end of the day is really just feeling unfulfilled and unsure of what the next best steps are for you in life? Are you one of the 60% of women who doesn't know her purpose?

Then, friends, please know that there is no shame--only celebration in recognizing this and do yourself and those around you a favor and contact Katie Crocombe the founder of Flourish + Co. She is a professional life coach and will partner with you to uncover your unique purpose, help you set grace-filled goals, hold you accountable, challenge you and help you say no to just good so you can say yes to the best.

Just for Surviving Sarah listeners, she is offering 10% off all coaching packages that are booked in 2017 and if you book before Feb 28, then you receive an additional $100 off the purchase. Click on the image below and it will take you directly to her contact page--mention the show and she'll take it from there! 

Thank you for following along life with me. I love being apart of your day. And as always, I hope this show helps you survive a little easier.

A new episode every Tuesday... just subscribe.

Subscribe for free on iTunes or Stitcher or your favorite podcast app so that you don't miss out on great conversations with women just like you. Women who are surviving and thriving. You don't have to do life alone. Be inspired, encouraged and entertained by women like Sandra Stanley, Shannan Martin, Jamie B. Golden, Mo Isom, Annie F. Downs, Joni Lay from Lay Baby Lay, Christy Nockels and many more.

Did you enjoy today's conversation? Rate the podcast.

My goal each week is to encourage you to survive in this very thing called life. If you were encouraged or inspired or entertained, head over to iTunes and leave a brief review with a 5 star rating.

Here is a recent one from AJ in VA:  "I have recently discovered the podcast and have enjoyed listening to all the episodes and learning about the different guests while at work (desktop on the computer all day. I listen to the show via ipod). It has given me a faith boost by the 'hanging with the girlfriends' atmosphere that makes me feel like I am a part of the conversation. Keep up the good work, looking forward to future episodes."

Your review will help get the podcast in front of new listeners who are just like you looking to know that they aren't alone in life. Thank you for being awesome!

Episode 59: Natalie Stanfield

Natalie Stanfield joins me for Episode 59. I think so many of you will relate to her because she is a lot like you. You probably know someone just like her at your church, in the carpool line or at Starbucks. That's because she is a wife and mama of two. She is someone who has allowed her past to connect to her present and influence her future. Because of her past, God has woven a thread through her life giving her a desire to help her kids love and serve others. 

We talk about motherhood, her feelings of her broken past, and how she discovered an easy way to talk to her kids (and your kids) about loving and loving others.

I hope you enjoyed my conversation with Natalie. I walked away with several things from our conversation, and I really loved our talks about loving and serving others. I am so excited about the Families For Families newsletter from Care For AIDS. I have seen this newsletter and it is so helpful. Talking to your kids about serving and loving others can feel overwhelming, but this newsletter really breaks it down making it easy. I really encourage you to head over to the show notes and follow the link to sign up.

Links:

Survival Kit:

(Amazon affiliate links used when possible. Don't forget to use SurvivingSarah.com/amazon when shopping for any of your amazon needs.)

Connect with Natalie:  Instagram  

Connect with Families For Families: Instagram // Facebook 

Takeaways From Our Conversation:

  • I really liked how she related motherhood to how our heavenly Father must love us. "There is nothing that I won't do for them. There is nothing that they can do or say to make me love them less. And its such a picture of the Father's love."
  • Look around at where you are. You never know who God may connect you with. Be the kind of person that someone can feel free enough to share their story without fear of judgment or rejection. 

  • @@Anything built worthwhile takes time@@. Everything over time makes a difference.

What did you enjoy about this episode? What was your takeaway. Let's continue the conversation  on Instagram or Twitter or you can send me an email here

A big thank you to Surviving Sarah sponsor, Flourish + Co. Are you a mom who thought she'd find her purpose in motherhood and didn't? Are you a woman who at the end of the day is really just feeling unfulfilled and unsure of what the next best steps are for you in life? Are you one of the 60% of women who doesn't know her purpose?

Then, friends, please know that there is no shame--only celebration in recognizing this and do yourself and those around you a favor and contact Katie Crocombe the founder of Flourish + Co. She is a professional life coach and will partner with you to uncover your unique purpose, help you set grace-filled goals, hold you accountable, challenge you and help you say no to just good so you can say yes to the best.

Just for Surviving Sarah listeners, she is offering 10% off all coaching packages that are booked in 2017 and if you book before Feb 28, then you receive an additional $100 off the purchase. Click on the image below and it will take you directly to her contact page--mention the show and she'll take it from there! 

Thank you for following along life with me. I love being apart of your day. And as always, I hope this show helps you survive a little easier.

A new episode every Tuesday... just subscribe.

Subscribe for free on iTunes or Stitcher or your favorite podcast app so that you don't miss out on great conversations with women just like you. Women who are surviving and thriving. You don't have to do life alone. Be inspired, encouraged and entertained by women like Sandra Stanley, Shannan Martin, Jamie B. Golden, Mo Isom, Annie F. Downs, Joni Lay from Lay Baby Lay, Christy Nockels and many more.

Did you enjoy today's conversation? Rate the podcast.

My goal each week is to encourage you to survive in this very thing called life. If you were encouraged or inspired or entertained, head over to iTunes and leave a brief review with a 5 star rating.

Here is a recent one from AJ in VA:  "I have recently discovered the podcast and have enjoyed listening to all the episodes and learning about the different guests while at work (desktop on the computer all day. I listen to the show via ipod). It has given me a faith boost by the 'hanging with the girlfriends' atmosphere that makes me feel like I am a part of the conversation. Keep up the good work, looking forward to future episodes."

Your review will help get the podcast in front of new listeners who are just like you looking to know that they aren't alone in life. Thank you for being awesome!

Episode 58: Rachel Stafford

Rachel Stafford joins me for Episode 58. You may know her as the Hands Free Mama. She is is a wife and mother to girls, special ed teacher, blogger and New York Times best-selling author. When I started the podcast, Rachel was at the top of the list to people to invite to the kitchen table. I have been reading her blog for years and she has unknowingly been instrumental in helping me be a better mother.

Our conversation is one of my favorite episodes. I can't tell you how many notes I took and moments of just enlightenment that I experienced. I relate so well to Rachel and I'm thankful for her insight and encouragement. We talk about how to choose love today, how to let go of control and expectations and how failing is not as bad as we think.

Links:

Survival Kit:

(amazon affiliate links used when possible)

Connect with Rachel:  Instagram // Facebook // Pinterest // Twitter // Website

Takeaways From Our Conversation:

  • I really liked the phrases that she used for herself and her kids. Phrases like "Be kind to yourself," and "We all make mistakes." I have been using those since we recorded. Sometimes you just need someone to tell you exactly what to say. The other one is "Only love today." I can't tell you how many times I have looked in the mirror and my first thought was something negative, but then I chose to say "only love today" and "be kind to yourself." I do believe that those words have the power to retrain our mind. 
  • How do I retrain the negative voice in my head? It starts by what you tell yourself. @@Change the way you speak to yourself. Choose to believe the best in yourself@@.
  • What does love require? What if we simply approached life, relationships, encounters, conflicts with that simple phrase?
  • Surrender. I want to start looking at each moment and see if this this a moment where I need to surrender. I am learning to let go. It's a tension we must learn how to manage. When it comes to my kids, I ask myself: Is this a parenting issue or a personal issue?
  • "@@When you are making mistakes, you are living and trying! It is enough. It is time to love yourself AS IS@@. Live boldly, bravely and full of hope." @@We need to let kids learn how to fail now so that they will be okay with failing later@@.
  • We must retrain ourselves and our kids that problems aren't bad. We just need to figure out how to solve them.
  • I'm going to take myself out of the running of being the best. Take the pressure off of trying to be the best. @@Do your best but you don't have to be the best@@.

What did you enjoy about this episode? What was your takeaway. Let's continue the conversation  on Instagram or Twitter or you can send me an email here

A big thank you to Surviving Sarah sponsor, Flourish + Co. Are you a mom who thought she'd find her purpose in motherhood and didn't? Are you a woman who at the end of the day is really just feeling unfulfilled and unsure of what the next best steps are for you in life? Are you one of the 60% of women who doesn't know her purpose?

Then, friends, please know that there is no shame--only celebration in recognizing this and do yourself and those around you a favor and contact Katie Crocombe the founder of Flourish + Co. She is a professional life coach and will partner with you to uncover your unique purpose, help you set grace-filled goals, hold you accountable, challenge you and help you say no to just good so you can say yes to the best.

Just for Surviving Sarah listeners, she is offering 10% off all coaching packages that are booked in 2017 and if you book before Feb 28, then you receive an additional $100 off the purchase. Click on the image below and it will take you directly to her contact page--mention the show and she'll take it from there! 

Thank you for following along life with me. I love being apart of your day. And as always, I hope this show helps you survive a little easier.

A new episode every Tuesday... just subscribe.

Subscribe for free on iTunes or Stitcher or your favorite podcast app so that you don't miss out on great conversations with women just like you. Women who are surviving and thriving. You don't have to do life alone. Be inspired, encouraged and entertained by women like Sandra Stanley, Shannan Martin, Jamie B. Golden, Mo Isom, Annie F. Downs, Joni Lay from Lay Baby Lay, Christy Nockels and many more.

Did you enjoy today's conversation? Rate the podcast.

My goal each week is to encourage you to survive in this very thing called life. If you were encouraged or inspired or entertained, head over to iTunes and leave a brief review with a 5 star rating.

Here is a recent one from AJ in VA:  "I have recently discovered the podcast and have enjoyed listening to all the episodes and learning about the different guests while at work (desktop on the computer all day. I listen to the show via ipod). It has given me a faith boost by the 'hanging with the girlfriends' atmosphere that makes me feel like I am a part of the conversation. Keep up the good work, looking forward to future episodes."

Your review will help get the podcast in front of new listeners who are just like you looking to know that they aren't alone in life. Thank you for being awesome!